RECORD News Articles

From 2005-2007 Scott Wegener contributed weekly to the Seventh-day Adventist church's South Pacific Division's weekly RECORD news magazine. Mainly working on the "Flashpoint" section, made up of snappy news stories a mere couple of paragraphs long, Scott collated and edited Christian related news stories that were usually either inspiring or through provoking (or perhaps downright ridiculous).
There's perhaps little point to republishing the hundreds of articles he completed again on site, but instead, here's perhaps his all time favorites he pieced together.

See how many puns and product references you can find in this fun article about Sanitarium that appeared in the February 12, 2005 issue of RECORD:
What do you get if you combine a dragon boat, water plus a team of Sanitarium workers? Weet-Bix Warriors, a team recipe so good it has now produced its third consecutive dragon-boat race win. Organised by the West Lake Macquarie Support Group, the fundraising event, on Lake Macquarie,  NSW, raised $A6000 to help keep the Westpac rescue helicopter up and going. Out of the spread of competitors the Wyee Rural Fire Service tried
to mar mighty Weet-Bix Warriors serial wins, but the Sanitarium team’s 20
paddlers, drummer and helmsman’s good start helped them claim a narrow victory.—

 

And another I oped a bit of fun into, June 11, 2005:

If all the Weet-Bix eaten in Australia during 2004 were laid end to end it would be a very expensive exercise and a logistical nightmare. However, if it were actually accomplished, it would stretch almost three times around the equator. Also, if a football field measuring 100 metres x 40 metres were covered with the Weet-Bix made last year from Sanitarium’s Cooranbong factory alone, it would be enough to cover the field to a depth of approximately 4.5 metres. Mix that with the almost 10 Olympic-size swimming pools of So Good produced each year and you’ve got a super serve of seriously soggy cereal!—Scott Wegener 


And here's one made up for April 1, 2006
A recent ministers meeting in Greater Sydney Conference discussed the growing trend of conducting Bible cyber-studies over the internet. While it was unanimously agreed that studying via the internet was both a time and fi nancially economical method of preparing a candidate for baptism, disagreement came over the act of baptism itself conducted via the internet. A subsequent vote came out in favour of cyper-baptisums being recognised as a valid practice of the conference on the condition that the right font was used.—Owen Lee/Joe King

 

Ok, one more from RECORD (Maybe I DID have more fun than I remember...): http://www.scottpublished.com/2005/03/record-record-offering.html

 

COPYRIGHT

All items on this site are written by Scott Wegener, a multi award-winning Australian creative writer, specialising in fun Christian dramas and articles. He believes in looking on the lighter side of life while still valuing the eternal seriousness of life's decisions. This site is essentially a place Scott stores his works, sometimes without much copy-editing (do forgive any spelling/grammar creativity you spot on this site that comes free of charge due to his slight dyslexia).

WANT TO USE SOMETHING ON THIS SITE? You probably can! FIND OUT HERE!