Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church Christmas Concert - December 21, 2019
[Chris walks in, optionally whistling “We three kings”, carrying a chair and sits centre stage toward the audience. As sits down Courier comes in.]
Courier: Christmas gift for... Chris?
Chris: That’s me! Who’s it from?
Courier: Err... [looks at phone].... God?? Sign here, please.
[Chris signs Courier’s phone, a tiny gift, size of a wedding ring box, is handed over and courier leaves. Chris looks at it a little confused and then begins to try and open it, but doesn’t make any progress before Courier enters again.]
Courier: Sorry, had another Christmas gift for you too. Sign here.
Chris: Who’s this one from? [signs]
Courier: Err.... Ssss-tan?? [hands over shoe box size gift]
Chris: Who's Stan?
[Courier leaves, Chris puts aside God’s present and looks more excited about this bigger gift. Opens the paper to reveal a shoebox]
Chris: Oh, I love shoes!
[Opens box and inside is one old shoe]
Chris: What am I going to do with this?
[Puts down shoe, picks up God’s gift again, but is interrupted as courier enters again]
Courier: Sorry, here’s another gift for you. Sign here.
Chris: Who’s THIS one from? [signs]
Courier: Err.... Louis?? [hands over a microwave size gift]
Chris: Louis??
[Courier leaves, Chris puts aside God’s present again and looks excited about this bigger gift. Opens it and inside is some old pot plant containers. Chris is unimpressed]
Chris: Seriously!?
[Puts down pot plant containers, picks up God’s gift again, but is interrupted as courier enters again]
Courier: And..... here's another Christmas gift for you. Sign here.
Chris: Who’s THIS one from? [signs]
Courier: err.... Devon? . [hands over a Christmas tree size gift]
[Courier leaves, Chris puts aside God’s present again and looks excited about this bigger gift. Opens it and inside is a piece of paper - takes it out and reads it. ]
Chris: Taxidermied seaweed samples??
[from the back room a beeping truck sound is heard and then air breaks being applied, courier enters.]
Courier: Delivery of plastic mice.
Chris: You have a box of plastic mice for me?
Courier: Um, no.
Chris: Just as well! You had me there for a moment.
Chris: An entire shipping container full of plastic mice, actually.
Chris: Ummm - No! Don’t want it. Thank you.
[courier leaves. Helicopter sound builds in volume from the back audience balcony, fans are turned up to full, pilot walks down to the front of the balcony and calls down to Chris]
Pilot: Delivery for... Chris?
Chris: What is it?
Pilot: Umm.... 19 million burst water balloons. Just need you to sign for them.
Christ: No, I'm not signing for them.
[Pilot/copter sounds leaves/dies down, then from the back room a large container ship horn sounds loudly. A captain enters]
Captain: A shipment for... Chris?
Chris: What is it this time??
Captain: Typewriter ribbons
Chris: What am I going to do with a shipping container full of typewriter ribbons.
Captain: Um, an entire shipment actually.
Chris: Entire shipment?
Captain: Yep, 19 thousand shipping containers full.
Chris: Of typewriter ribbons?
Captain: Yep, second hand.
Chris: umm..... how about No!
[Captain leaves. On screen comes a space walking astronaut, with communication beeps]
Astronaut: [pssht] Got a delivery for... Chris? Do you copy? [pssht]
Chris: Yes? What have you got?
Astronaut: [pssht] An asteroid? [pssht]
Chris: An asteroid? Really? [unimpressed]
Astronaut: [pssht] Affirmative. About half the size of the moon. Where would you like it? [pssht]
Chris: Um, how about nowhere!
Astronaut: [pssht] What are we going to do with it then?
Chris: Err, that's your problem!
Astronaut: [pssht] um Huston... we have a problem..... [pssht]
[Chris sits, a little dejected, and then remembers the present from God. Not holding any hopes, reads its note again]
Chris: To Chris, Merry Christmas, love God.
[opens gift and an internal light shines on Chris’ face, which expresses a melted and appreciative heart, overwhelmed with the mystery item in the box, far better than any of the previous deliveries.... closes the gift, holds it to their heart and mouths ‘thank you’ up to the sky, and walks out with it, smiling.]
Optional 'on screen' ending:
The biggest gift of all: The Light of the World ~ Jesus!
Christian dramas (and more) by Scott Wegener