A Mother's Hospitality [script]

 [A Mother’s Day skit with a them of hospitality... and a twist!]

[Airplane seating, 4 chairs in a grid with an isle, all facing the side door end of the stage.]
[A hostess stands and waits at the back of the chairs.]
[ a Man walks in the side stage door with a child hurried along in front of him]


HOSTESS: Welcome aboard!

DAD: There you go, I’ll see you later. 

[Child flops in a back row chair, audience side. Dad leaves the same door and closes it]

HOSTESS: Well, hello there! I’m so excited to have you aboard. Sit back and relax, and if there’s anything I can get you, just ask. [walks to back of plane]

CHILD: Excuse me. 

HOSTESS: Yes, how can I help you?

CHILD: Can I get something to eat? 

HOSTESS: Sure, what would you like?

CHILD: What have you got?

HOSTESS: Anything you like.

CHILD: Aaaaanything???

HOSTESS: Anything you like.

CHILD: Oh cool! Well, could I have some coffee ice cream and pickles please?

HOSTESS: I’ll see what I can do.

[on radio] Can we please get some coffee ice cream and pickles down here please?

CHILD: Excuse me. 

HOSTESS: Yes, how can I help you?

CHILD: Could I change that to some onions with mustard?

HOSTESS: I’ll see what I can do.

[on radio] Actually, can we change that to mustard onions?

HOSTESS: Won’t be long, someone’s on it for you.

[‘clicking’ sound plays in left speaker, then right speaker]

HOSTESS: Oh, excuse me, if you wouldn’t mind facing the wall and smiling for a moment.

[sound stops]

HOSTESS: Thank you…. Ma’am! All done, Ma’am. 

CHILD: Excuse me. 

HOSTESS: Just a moment.  [ has a quiet little vomit in a back up the back of the plane.]

HOSTESS: Sorry about that. How can I help you, Ma’am?

CHILD: Actually you could turn the temperature up for me.

HOSTESS: Certainly Ma’am, I’ll see what I can do.

[adjusts at the back and returns]

HOSTESS: How’s that?

CHILD: More heat, please.

HOSTESS: Certainly Ma’am, I’ll see what I can do.

[adjusts at the back and returns]

HOSTESS: How’s that now, Ma’am?

CHILD: More heat, please.

HOSTESS: Certainly Ma’am, I’ll set it to maximum.

[adjusts at the back and returns]

[child starts kicking the chair back that’s in front of him.

HOSTESS: Please don’t kick.

[Child Kicks again]

HOSTESS: Please don’t kick.

[Child Stands and starts pushing the chairs over (gently/safely).]

HOSTESS: OK that’s enough….. I think it’s time to disembark

CHILD: Leave? No, I’m happy here.

HOSTESS: No, I really think it’s time to leave

CHILD: Can I say just a little bit longer?

HOSTESS: Ok, but not much longer.

CHILD: Why not?

HOSTESS: Well. Let’s just say they’ll cut the roof open and pull you out if you stay much longer.

CHILD: Ok, Ok, I’m going.

[child get’s up]

HOSTESS: All the best out there! It’s been lovely having you here! [hugs]

[Child starts to walk out backwards.]

HOSTESS: Actually, if you don’t mind, could you please exit facing forwards?

[Child turns and walks up to half opened door, and struggles to fit thought.]

HOSTESS: Here, let me help you. After three. 1, 2, 3, puusshhh! [ hostess pushes child]

HOSTESS: Again, 1, 2, 3, Puuuusssshh!

HOSTESS: Ok one more time. Big push this time. 1 2 3 Puuuuuuuuuuussshhhhhhh!!!!

[exits – newborn baby cry sound fx plays in back room]

HOSTESS: [stands, body facing audience, but head turned towards the door, hugs herself and has a proud emotional smile]

Happy birthday, Daughter!

Feeeeewwwww! [sees chairs] What a mess. This is going to take me months to clean up.

[Looks at audience…. nods] Totally worth it!


Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church May 11, 2024 

COPYRIGHT

All items on this site are written by Scott Wegener, a multi award-winning Australian creative writer, specialising in fun Christian dramas and articles. He believes in looking on the lighter side of life while still valuing the eternal seriousness of life's decisions. This site is essentially a place Scott stores his works, sometimes without much copy-editing (do forgive any spelling/grammar creativity you spot on this site that comes free of charge due to his slight dyslexia).

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